The end of my proverbial rope...

I have good days, and I have bad days.

What's not good is when the bad days turn into bad weeks...

Yes, my status on facebook says "Melissa is stressed. Long story." I think my status has said that for a few days. I haven't bothered changing it because I haven't had to. :(

Yes, I'm done. I have days/weeks like this where I just wonder, "Where are you, Lord?" I have no peace, I have no rest, I have no joy...in their place are tension and feelings of overwhelm. And cravings. I've been doing so well, but off the wagon I go! *sigh*

I'm exhausted - more mentally than physically. I love my family, but these last few days have been so inconsistent in routines and such that the boys are a disaster...I'm a disaster. All I want is a few moments to be still with God, instead of trying to run around to the next time-sensitive task. It's like all the inflexible things needed to happen all at the same time, and it's wreaking havoc on our home. I hate it. I just want to be still. Just for a few simple moments.

It's not that the things I've been needing to do are stressful in and of themselves - there have been 3 bridal showers for Carly (my almost sister-in-law), a garden to plant (which I had so much fun doing!), lots of prep to do for the boys who will be ring-bearers in the wedding, a big birthday party to go to for some close friends, etc. And Graeme has his pharmacy fiscal year-end coming up this week. I enjoy doing the tasks, but with either Graeme or me constantly coming and going, the boys have no idea which end is up anymore. And they're acting out more (especially Joshua), which makes me resent the busy-ness that's befallen us.

I just want to be still.

"Be still and know that I am God" Psalm 46:10. Oh God, I need stillness right now!!